Well . . . since it’s a FACT . . . o.O
I will admit I have a healthy fear of creepy crawly things. Not all, just one, well . . . two, nope, a good amount of creepy crawly thingies do make my skin crawl and my knees wobble, and my heart rate to rise.
I’m good with lizards, and moths, bats and mosquitoes, and even flies.
What gives me the heebeegeebees though?
Flying, crawling, teenagers, drummers, you name it . . . from it have ROACH in it’s name, mi gone! And I can’t even tell you which one scares me more. I guess the teenagers I can handle; dem likkle bit and nah no sense more time, so I can always just crush them. But dem kinda faas, so I have to be careful with them, cyaan get too confident with them.
But regula cockroach? The Flying kind? Oh lawd!
Here’s the thing with me and cockroaches.
Apart from the fact that they are the nastiest things alive, they are the devil incarnate, I swear. You know how they say “show the dog you are the pack-master”? Yeah, well, that shit don’t work on cockroaches.
I remember when I was a child, I saw a drummer roach in the back-yard once and I decided that amma get this sucker before he gets me. So I took a stone, a nice sizeable stone, and dropped it on the drummer. I did not hear the crunch associated with a dead drummer (of course, at the time I didn’t know I needed to hear that sound to know the deed was done), nor did I hear a squish. As a result, I subsequently pissed the drummer roach off, who then proceeded to run me down. Yes! The drummer cockroach ran after me. And I swear, to this day, all cockroaches are a frigging insurgent.
They will run you down.
Don’t say I didn’t warn you!
Remember Joe’s Apartment?!?!?
As a matter of fact, if I had 3 questions I could ask God on my hay day, one would be devoted to the creation and existence of cockroaches. . . Why God? Why?
The other thing that gets me is spiders.
Daddy-long-legs I can work with. They are completely harmless aside from the false sense of security you feel around other spiders because of the Daddy-long-legs.
But any spider bigger than the Daddy-long-legs is a problem for me. I was even trepidacious about the Spiderman movies because of that fact. Any spider that is bigger, with a different colour, longer legs, thicker cob-webs, stripes, pincers, etc etc etc. I will not hesitate to admit I am scared shitless of them.
I remember I saw a picture of a spider on a wall with a man holding either a pan or a bucket over the spider just to give you an idea of how big the spider is. The picture was probably a hoax but nevertheless, it scared me away from the thought of ever visiting Australia. In fact, a friend and I were discussing the other day, the various poisonous creatures there in the land down under, and I was scared even more. I understand and accept the nature of snakes but I don’t fear them. I just know, they’re not your friend . . . so run!
But spiders?! Spiders that can hide anywhere, in every crack and crevice, with their sticking icky cob-webs and fly traps. Everything spiders scare me, and then to hear there is a fish-eating spider in the land down under?!
Oh hell no! Don’t tell me these things. How do you expect me to sleep at night?
What scares the bejeezus out of you?